Grocery Store Dropout

It’s no secret that I hate grocery shopping. I don’t know what it is, or maybe it’s just that I prefer to do it alone, at my own speed and will. I especially hate going during the evening time when everyone and their mama decides to go, partly because I hate crowds and partly because we end up getting home so late. OR maybe I just like to complain, either way, I don’t like it.

So you can imagine the excitement on my face when my husband said the inevitable phrase, “we need to go grocery shopping!” I managed to postpone it for one night and had to literally psyche myself up for it the whole next day. I was repeating in my head “you are going to go grocery shopping tonight, you can’t back out!”

There is one other small thing, well he’s about 30 pounds and almost 3 years old. Yea, that little reason made me almost crumble and ask my husband to go alone. We avoid taking our son to the grocery store as much as possible.

We like to wait until he’s with his grandparents to do it but we just couldn’t wait any longer, we were on the verge of starvation. It’s kind of like my laundry….I will wait and wait and wait until I am down to my ugliest pair of underwear and down to that shirt that I just HATE to wear before I do my laundry!

So since starving wasn’t an option, there we went!

The whole ride there I told my husband, this might be a mistake. “You know he’s going to want to run around the store the whole time and won’t even consider sitting in the cart!” He knew what was coming but we hadn’t any other choice!

Once we got there my son seemed to do alright. Granted, he was walking up to every type of cheese or can of something and picking it up to put it in the cart but other than that, he just seemed to want to be helpful!

It was obvious we weren’t going to get much done so I basically took on the task of asking my son to come with me to get things to put in the cart and he seemed thrilled! So as I gathered a couple boxes of Caprisuns which I let him pick out, he ran off telling me he’s going to go get something else.

As I went chasing after him I realized he’s headed towards the produce section, which is never a good combo with a toddler! When I saw the first lemon go up into the air, my outside voice became the inside voice! I was yelling his name and running as fast as I could, still holding 2 Caprisun boxes!

He ran away from me and decided to do what his Daddy and him call a “chest bump” to a stack of jarred gravy! I gasped and my heart sank once I saw the gravy shift! Then I have shoppers laughing and telling me that “I’m brave!” Uh yes I’m brave and also stupid!

This was the worst idea EVER!

So I screamed for my husband and he came and saved the day as I looked like the mom who couldn’t control her child. Fine, whatever, I’m used to it!

We got into a groove of just keeping my son busy helping me grab things off the shelves and put them in the cart until I noticed it got a little too quiet.

I yelled his name once or twice only to hear him say “Mom, I over here!” Oh, good there he was, oh but wait, what the….”STOP!” I yelled, as he was trying to punch his little fingers through the plastic of all the meat packages!

And whenever I yell “stop” and go running towards him, it’s as if someone begins tickling him under his arms! He gets giddy, begins to laugh hysterically and of course runs in the other direction like he’s racing in a track meet!

Eventually I gave up on that duty and handed it over to my husband while I loaded the groceries onto the conveyer belt. It was the most peaceful time of the whole trip. Even glancing over and seeing my son have a meltdown in my husband’s arms didn’t shake me a bit! Of course my husband couldn’t take much of it by the looks of him beginning to bag the groceries and leave my son running wild!

It’s safe to say I now understand why they have the little toy vending machines by the exit door…I hope he enjoyed the little eraser duck he got who’s beak fell off before we even got out of the store!

That thing is still floating around my house, and I have yet to figure out what it’s purpose is to my son!

I guess I like to learn the hard way. Maybe that will cure my habit of waiting until the last minute to go grocery shopping!

Or maybe it drove my husband so crazy that he won’t want to take either of us again, HAHA!

I can only hope!

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