Reflection

There comes a time in our lives whether you have hit this point, or are still on your journey there, where you long for a deeper meaning!

You long for substance and purpose.

You yearn for more, which makes you think deeper, feel deeper and look inward.

We start becoming very aware of our surroundings, aware of how others treat others and aware of how we treat others.

For most of our lives thus far, we’ve looked in the mirror and seen what we’ve wanted to see. We could have been the worst friend that day but refused to admit it, and when we look in the mirror we see someone who is “right” and gave our friend what she deserved.

We may be the most warm, loving, caring person in the world but when we look in the mirror we see a bad person, because someone told us we were.

We go through life seeing many different versions of ourselves. Some we never want to see again and some we wish we would see more often. It’s a learning and growing experience!

It’s when we hit this point where we are truly ready to see who and what is really staring back at us, that change happens. It can only be good, because when one acknowledges who one really is, is when things come together.

I’ve said time and time again in past blog entries that denial can be an evil thing. It tricks you into believing something you really don’t believe. To suppress feelings that will never stay that way but fester and grow until we can’t take it anymore.

Denial can give a lot of us time. Time for ourselves to come to grips with reality, as strange as that sounds. Denial is a transition, at least that’s all it should be. It’s a segue into truth, honesty and acceptance. But people who live in denial and make it their permanent roommate are the ones who are stuck, can’t get out of their own head and in turn will project that onto anything and everyone that comes into their path.

Ever had those relationships where the other person or maybe even yourself is constantly negative?

A person may be extremely critical of you all the time! Nothing you do is right, nothing you wear is right and there is always a fight to be started.

When you come to this point in life where I am at, it’s easy for me to see clearly what is really going on! This person is miserable with themselves! Nothing they do is acceptable to themselves, therefore they need you to feel that same pain.

When people are negative, mean, vindictive and abusive, this is not about you, this is all how they feel about themselves.

When you come across balanced, honest, truly happy people, most of the time you will receive warmth, love and a general “good vibe” from them. That’s because those people feel that way about themselves.

Now I’m not saying that all people who give off good vibes are stable and have it all together. But when you are consistently experiencing that same feeling with someone, that is who they are. That is how they feel about themselves.

We’ve all seen someone walk into the room and felt the energy change right? Whether it’s good or bad. People carry it with them. They create this energy and it goes everywhere with them, with us!

My point is, when you are being treated a certain way by someone, don’t think to yourself “oh I am such a bad person because this person is always so rude and mean to me!” Know that this person is taking all of their negative energy that they feel about themselves and trying to project it onto you.

But you don’t have to accept it! You get to say what you will let into your life, that’s up to you!

Now look in the mirror at who you see!

When you have a bad day, don’t take out that negativity on someone else who didn’t ask for it. Odds are if they don’t know you all that well, they won’t want to! But if you shine a light on them and create an opportunity to let them feel accepted, they will want to know you!

It’s hard to look in the mirror and really understand who we are and what we see. It takes years to even feel the desire to do so. But once we do, we are at a place of transition and change.

We have strength and feel power to say “I know I’m not perfect, I just want to better myself for me and the people around me!” It’s a level of maturity and readiness!

Don’t be afraid of it! For some of us it happens at a young age and for some of us, it takes our whole lives!

But when you get there, be grateful that you made it!

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